Tuesday, April 26, 2005
*smugs*
the feeling 0f l0neliness has been overwhelming recently.
em0tionally that is.
in the presence 0f pe0ple, i strike 0thers as a free spirit.
but when i'm al0ne with n0 0ne else but my shad0w, these crappy em0tions engulf me.
i d0nt resent being al0ne.
but it scares me.
anyway...
vict0ry went t0 mj t0day. glad f0r them.
and i'm s0 sick 0f sch0ol. the w0rkload is never ending. the th0ught of it is truly depressing.
yea. i have absolutely zer0 idea what hansel's d0ing. or rather, what's in his mind. he seems t0 be misleading me or perhaps himself? shrugs. as i said, i've n0 intenti0n t0 be a third party. i'll have t0 be real cautious. when
handling him that is haha~...madness...
i d0nt know why i keep c0mparing myself t0 her. i kn0w its senseless and unnecessary yet i just cant seem t0 control h0w i'm feeling. i was t0ld by s0meone that there's s0mething he sees in me thats missing in her. stuff like that. yep i kn0w. i d0 understand. but why the heck is this happening! it pisses me 0ff at times. i'm mad at myself. grumps. then others will tell me stuff like...y0u're beautiful in y0ur own ways etc~ yap i kn0w all these. i just cant c0ntrol. zZz~... its crazy la... i hate t0 be compared by others yet i'm c0mparing myself t0 her?! such a contradictory. oh man. gotta buck up.
she may be what i'm n0t. but i'm what she's n0t to0. accept me f0r wh0 i am. if n0t my w0rld d0esnt welc0me or need you. you might be w0ndering who this girl is.
his girl. oh plss. its n0t even w0rth it thats why i'm s0 not happy ab0ut it.
pouts. i'm feeling emptyyyy...
take me with you
1:53 PM
